Wednesday, December 1, 2010


I've been having a really hard time, it's the holidays..and there's something about the holidays that just hurt so much. I am heartbroken, at times, it feels like I am exactly where I started. Betrayed, angry, hurt, overwhelmed, looking for answers, trying to fix it all. I hurt, something kinda crazy tonight. Everything, every memory, every intense feeling, and every sliver of hurt assaults again and again and again. Dear God, please. Please, please, please, make it be over.

I stumbled across an old video while packing, it was a video my extended family made of wedding wishes. There is so much love in that video, there is so much good and awesome and beautiful and sweet in that video. People ask me why? Why move back? See here, see this happy, fun-loving, incredibly special family? That's why.